What If One of Your Friends Is a Covert Narcissist?

You realize they fit the definition. What do you do?

When we hear the term “narcissist,” we tend to think of someone who constantly seeks to be the center of attention, who seeks to be praised and admired. They appear to have little concern for anyone but themselves, and what concern they do express is a performance. They’re so brash in their behavior that there might as well be a neon sign flashing “NARCISSIST” over their heads.

However, this is just one subcategory of narcissist, typically called an overt, malignant, or exhibitionist narcissist. These people are usually pretty easy to sidestep (assuming you’re not in a family or work situation with them) because their behavior is so blatant.

In previous articles, I have discussed how to spot a covert narcissist on social media, and why it’s pointless to seek revenge on a covert narcissist who wrongs you. In today’s article, I will tackle a different question.

Once you know what a covert narcissist is, and you understand why interacting with them can be dangerous, what do you do if someone in your friend group exhibits the signs of a covert narcissist?

I’ll go ahead and give you the good news: Most likely you won’t need to change a whole lot about your behavior. However, you do need to be careful.

Let’s take a minute to review covert narcissists’ behaviors, then come back and answer the question.

Covert narcissists, although modest and unassuming, faced many of the same developmental issues as overt/malignant narcissists, and therefore share many of the same behaviors:

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